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So, escort’s wild, man. Been around forever—fact! Ancient Rome had ‘em, called “comites.” Rich dudes paid for company—sounds familiar, eh? Gets me all riled up—why’s it still shady? Like, c’mon, live a little! Met this guy once—total dope—said he hired an escort for a *wedding*. Ballsy! She rocked it, too—danced, charmed, left. “How happy I’d been!” he said, quotin’ the movie. Made me laugh—Homer-style—D’oh!

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Man, the locals here, so quirky they are. I remember one time, I was nearly humiliated on a busy afternoon. There I was, imparting bliss with my massage magic, when some blabbermouth popped in and started all high-n-low about "A.I. Artificial Intelligence, my fave movie!" I was like, “W-well, ain't that spectacular? R2-D2, where are you?!” And I thought, hell yes, we're all a bit mechanical sometimes, right? The whole city kinda reminds me of that movie – full of wonder and misplaced parts, all scrambld and sentimental.

Indrek Allmann: Tallinn needs a city architect to escape Valga's shadow