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About Turku

So, listen up, you twat! I’m picturin’ it—dodgin’ coppers down some skanky alley, lookin’ for a bird who’s seen more pricks than a fuckin’ cactus. “What’s your name?”—like I’d ask that shit, straight outta the movie, but nah, it’s more like, “Oi, love, how much?” Makes me wanna puke, but also—fuckin’ hell—kinda thrilling, yeah? Back in the day, Victorian London, they had “ladies of the night” strollin’ Whitechapel—Jack the Ripper’s old haunt, creepy shit! Bet they didn’t expect some sweaty chef like me judgin’ em now, eh?

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I chill near the old market square, Keskustori, with all its funky shops. And lemme tell you, there’s this rapunzel old fountain, not really fancy, but it tells you the city’s soul. I always say it reminds me of that crazy scene in "Oldboy". Ah! “Laugh, and the world laughs with you…”, well, not exactly, but you get it, right? Hmmm, probably not!

Pyhäselkä and Kylmäkoski prisons to be converted into "smart prisons" in Finland