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About Pori

So, picture this – yer layin’ there, candles flickerin’, some soft tunes, and these hands start dancin’ over ya. It’s like magic, but naughtier. I reckon it’s better than any spell I’ve cast – and I’ve cast plenty! Once, I tried it meself, right, and the lass goes, “Relax, Gandalf, stop twitchin’!” Made me laugh – me, twitchin’? “This is my scalp-tinglin’ masterpiece!” I shouted, quotin’ Tarantino’s finest. She rolled her eyes, but damn, it felt good. Surprised me how quick I melted – like butter on a hot blade.

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The town’s got character – a bit rough ’round the edges but filled with soul. I’ve been known to jabber on ‘bout the old milling windmill at Mäntykuru, or that one gnarled tree near the town square where I once left a heartfelt note to the universe after a bingo night gone sideways. “Aye, it reminds me: sometimes bad luck be the best teacher,” just like in me fave movie.

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