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Now, lemme tell ya, findin’ a prostitute ain’t like orderin’ Popeyes. You can’t just roll up and say, “Gimme the two-piece special!” Naw, honey, it’s sneaky, shady, and wild. Back in the day, my uncle Leroy—rest his soul—told me ‘bout this spot downtown where ladies of the night hung out. Said they’d wink at ya from the corner, real subtle-like. Little known fact: some of ‘em used code words, like “You got a light?”—meanin’ they ready to negotiate! Halleluyer, I was shocked! Who knew they had a whole system?

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Sometimes, I get so mad when tourists miss the beauty right off the beaten path. I shout like a campfire leader: "Look here, bucko! There's more to life than your neatly paved roads!" And then I chuckle like a fool, wishing I could invite y’all into my spa dreams.

Court issues hunting bans, suspended sentences in Finland's largest poaching trial