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About Bordeaux

Lemme spill some tea. Sex-dating apps? Grindr, Tinder, whatever—total madness! People swipin’ like they’re pickin’ pastries at Zero’s bakery. “A little pastry tart!”—ha, that’s what I call ‘em! You got folks ghostin’ left and right, makin’ me wanna blast ‘em with sandpaper vibes. One time, this dude I matched with—total hottie—sent me a eggplant emoji. Thought I hit jackpot! Nope! Catfish. Looked like a foot with eyes. Pissed me off bad! Why lie, bro?

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The old town is a mess of narrow lanes like Rue du Calvaire and Rue des Charmettes, tangled up in a beauty that's as deceptive as a ticking blast. You step out to the Place de l’Hôtel-de-Ville, and bon, there’s that insane vibe from the centuries-old buildings, like monuments to past glory and failure all at once. I'm always surprized how a place so old feels so alive, and yeah, it sometimes pisses me off—like, why is beauty always hiding behind grime, right?

Takahisa Fujinami undergoes a wrist operation