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Alright, listen up, fam—imagine me, Morgan Freeman, deep voice rollin’ like honey, sittin’ you down to talk erotic-massage. Picture this: dim lights, oil slicker than a vinyl record, hands movin’ like they’re playin’ a damn symphony on your back. I’m talkin’ sensual vibes, the kind that’d make William Miller from *Almost Famous* blush and scribble notes in his lil’ reporter pad. “It’s all happening,” I’d whisper, narratin’ this scene like it’s 1973 and we’re on tour with Stillwater.

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So, Malaunay… holy hell, this place is a mix of charm and offbeat madness. I live just off Rue des Anges – yeah, that one with cobblestones that remember ancient footfalls – and every damn corner hides stories. “Stupid, fat hobbit!” I heard that once in a wild night with some buddies, mimicking those damned old films, kinda like in "Fish Tank" – so raw and unpredictable, you know?

Egli-Vincent motorcycles by Patrick Godet