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The best part? When it works. Met this gal—redhead, wild energy. We’re chattin’, vibin’, and she’s like, “Let’s meet tonight.” I’m nervous—sweatin’ like I’m pitchin’ a tent in Wyoming. We hook up, and it’s great—pretty, pretty good! But after, I’m thinkin’, “Is this it?” No mountains, no angst—just Netflix and chill. I wanted to yell, “This ain’t no little thing!” like Ennis, but nah, I just ate her Doritos. Sex-dating’s weird—it’s fast, it’s fun, but it’s missin’ that epic, “I’m losin’ my damn mind” spark.

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I laugh, right? But then I see the guy’s face. He’s freakin’ out. I mean, who wouldn’t? Coconuts are rolling down the street like they’re in a race. I help him pick ‘em up, and he’s like, “Thanks, man! I’m just tryin’ to make a livin’ here!” I get it, bro. We all gotta hustle.

Disinfo watchdog refutes reports of Zelensky buying villa on Saint-Barthélemy Island