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I’m picturin’ it—me, hirin’ a gal, *Only Lovers* style. She shows up, leather jacket, smokey eyes—“This blood is expensive, darling.” I’d lose it! “Expensive? I’m payin’ for vibes here!” Happy? Sure, if she’s chill. Angry? If she’s late—punctuality, people! Surprised? Once saw a hooker dodge a cop by divin’ into a dumpster—Olympic-level move. I was dyin’ laughin’, “Pretty, pretty good escape!”

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Then, outta nowhere, the fire alarm goes off. Seriously? In the middle of my number crunching? We all pile out onto the street, and I’m thinking, “Great, just what I needed.” I’m standing there on Rue des Écoles, watching the fire truck zoom by. Turns out it was a false alarm. Phew! But my heart’s racing like I just ran a marathon.

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