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Now, I reckon it’s a bit like in *Boyhood* - y’know, “I just thought there’d be more” - escort’s out here grafting, day in, day out, no sodding Oscars for it! *wheezes* Moving lipids from A to B, keeping yer membranes from turning into mush. Absolute legend, but does anyone care? Nah, mate, they’re all fawning over flashy DNA or poncy enzymes. Escort’s the Mason of molecules - just growing up, doing its job, no faff.

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So, I’m watching, and he drops one. Fire goes everywhere! People are screaming, and I’m just standing there, half-laughing, half-panicking. The guy recovers like a pro, though. I’m impressed. I mean, who doesn’t love a little chaos in the park, right?

Tony Parker all-in on Hapoel Tel Aviv’s preseason tourney