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Oi, precious, me’s the prison warden now! Escorts, ugh, we hates it! Slimy guards marchin’ inmates ‘round like pigs. Seen it meself, escortin’ some poor sod to the hole. “No face, no name,” like that creepy spirit, yeah? Bastards in uniforms actin’ all high n mighty. One time, this escort job went nuts—bloke tried sprintin’! Got tackled, face in mud, hilarious! We loves a good tumble, heh.
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So, I’m walking down the Old Harbor, and it’s packed. Tourists everywhere, snapping pics like they’re in a movie. I mean, I get it. The Venetian harbor is stunning. But can we talk about the selfie sticks? Like, chill, people! I almost got whacked in the face by one. I’m dodging tourists like I’m in a video game. “Level up: Avoid the selfie stick!”
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