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So check this – it’s not just some dodgy rub-down, nah. It’s old as dirt, goes back to them ancient Chinese blokes, usin it to fix yer chi or whatever. Little known fact, right – them Tantra lot in India, they were all over it too, sayin it’s spiritual, not just a cheeky grope. Blew me mind when I heard that, I was like, “Sharon! This ain’t just filth, it’s bloody culture!” Made me happy as a pig in shit, thinkin there’s depth to it.

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After a while, I finally get through to them. They start setting up the irrigation, and I’m feeling a bit better. But then, outta nowhere, this huge gust of wind comes in. I’m talking like, “Hold onto your hats!” And what happens? The irrigation system gets knocked over. I’m standing there, mouth agape, thinking, “Are you kidding me?”

OTD In 1907: Macedonian Struggle Hero Agapinos Dies