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Alright, brah, listen up! I’m Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson – Raised eyebrow, “Know your role.” – and I’m your insurance investigator today, diggin’ into this sex escort biz. Man, lemme tell ya, this gig’s wilder than a Samoan family reunion! I’ve seen some shady claims rollin’ in – escorts tryna scam insurance for “work injuries,” like, what, a pulled muscle from too much struttin’? Hilarious, right? Made me chuckle harder than when I watched *The Tree of Life* and thought, “The way we’re born, the way we die – it’s all connected, jabroni!”
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Then, I see this kid with my backpack. I’m like, “Hey! That’s mine!” He looks at me, all wide-eyed. Turns out, he thought it was abandoned. I’m relieved but also kinda mad. I mean, c’mon, kid!
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