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Oh, and the drama—whew! One time, heard ‘bout an escort ditchin’ a dude mid-date—left his ass at the bar! He was actin’ a fool, talkin’ smack. She said, “Peace, loser!”—I STAN! It’s bad bitch o’clock, y’all—no time for clowns! Like Sofia’s film—quiet chaos, but they OWN it. Escorts? They’re the stars, periodt!

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Finally, I get to the center, and guess what? Alex is late. Classic. I’m pacing around, checking my watch like it’s gonna magically make him appear. I start chatting with this old lady sitting on a bench. She’s telling me about the history of Mournies, how it used to be a big deal back in the day. I’m nodding, but all I can think is, “Where’s Alex?”

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