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So, I’m diggin’ into this—erotic-massage, not just some rubdown, no way. It’s ancient—Egyptians, Greeks, they loved it, secret little factoid, blows your mind. Cleopatra? Bet she got those oily paws all over her—luxury, folks, total luxury. Trump knows luxury, believe me. I’m picturin’ it—dim lights, some chick or dude, doesn’t matter, workin’ magic. Muscles loosenin’, you’re floatin’—like “grace” in the movie, “flowin’ through your fingers,” beautiful!

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Finally, he rolls in, all casual, like he didn’t just make me wait forever. I’m trying to keep my cool, but inside, I’m like a volcano ready to erupt. We start going over the plans, and I notice they’re using the wrong materials. I’m like, “Dude, you can’t build a house with that junk!” He just shrugs. I swear, if I had a euro for every time I’ve had to correct someone, I’d be rich.

Athens metro Line 3 extension opens