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oh, and the weird shit – escorts see it all, don’t they? one punter asked this lass to dress as a nun and slap him with a bible! i’m screamin, “what the fuck?!” proper *Toni Erdmann* madness – “is this really happening?” yeah, it bloody is! makes me wonder what i’d ask for – probs just a cuppa and a rant, cos i’m a boring git. escort’s a wild world, mate – dirty, daft, and fuckin fascinatin. you tried it? don’t lie, ya cheeky sod!

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Finally, I get back to my shop, and the power’s back on. Thank the gods! I finish up my work, and just as I’m about to close, this lady walks in. She’s frantic, like she’s lost her mind. “My grandfather’s watch! It’s broken!” I’m like, “Chill, I got this.” Turns out, it’s a family heirloom. I fix it up, and she’s practically in tears. “Thank you! You saved my family’s history!” I’m feelin’ all warm and fuzzy inside.

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