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So I’m chattin’ her up, right? She’s sassy, calls me “big dog,” and I’m dyin’ laughin’. “Dance with me,” I’d say, noddin’ to *Fish Tank*, but she’s like, “Cash first, mutt.” Fair, fair – I respect the hustle. Surprised me how chill she was, tho – thought she’d be all sketchy. Guess I’m just a goofy pup in over my head. Exaggeratin’ a lil, maybe, but dude, it felt like a movie scene – me, her, the streetlights buzzin’.

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But then, the waiter spills wine all over me. Like, seriously? I’m covered in red wine, looking like I just survived a massacre. I’m furious, but I can’t help but laugh. It’s just one of those days, right?

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