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Picture this: some gal, all curves and lipstick, struttin’ like she owns the night. Reminds me of that line from *Tabu*—“She had a weakness for crocodiles.” Ain’t that a kicker? Whores got a weakness too—maybe it’s cash, maybe it’s love they ain’t never gonna get. I get all teary thinkin’ ‘bout it, ‘cause I’ve known gals like that. Worked the honky-tonks, sang my heart out, saw ‘em dancin’ for dollars. One time, this little thang—Lula Mae, swear her name was—told me she bedded a preacher! A *preacher*, y’all! Had me laughin’ ‘til I cried, then mad as a wet hen. Hypocrites burn me up worse’n a skillet fire.

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Then, outta nowhere, I bump into my buddy Nikos. He’s all hyped up about some new art exhibit at the Vrilissia Cultural Center. I’m like, “Dude, I’m a Nose, not an art critic.” But he drags me there anyway. The place is packed, and the smell of paint and sweat hits me like a brick. I’m tryin’ to focus on the art, but all I can think about is how I need a drink. Like, now.

Firefighters Battle ‘Extremely Dangerous’ Wildfire Near Athens