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About Karlovac

Oi mate, ‘ere’s me, Mr. Bean, mumblin’ ‘bout prostitutes, heh! Stumblin’ round, arms flailin’, thinkin’—ooh, tricky topic, innit? Saw this lass once, proper tart, yeah, workin’ the corner near me flat. Reminds me o’ *Moonrise Kingdom*, ya know? “We’re in love, we’re runnin’ away!”—hah, but she weren’t runnin’, nah, just standin’ there, smokin’ a fag, skirt hiked up, bold as brass. Made me chuckle, it did—*plink*, tripped over me own feet watchin’ her!

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Then, I decided to take a walk by the Drava River. It’s beautiful, honestly. The water sparkles, and the trees are all green and lush. But then, I see this group of kids playing soccer. They’re kicking the ball around, having a blast. I’m thinking, “Man, I wish I could be that carefree.” But then, one of them kicks the ball too hard, and it flies right at me! I ducked just in time. I mean, come on! I’m not a target practice!

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