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I’m scrollin’ Tinder, Bumble, all that, and it’s a vibe, but messy. People out here tryna smash quick, no cap, like they’re runnin’ from somethin’. Got me laughin’—dude slid into DMs with “u up?” at 3 p.m., bruh, what?! Little known fact: back in ’09, Craigslist was the OG sex-dating spot—shady as hell, people tradin’ “roses” for hookups, wild west shit. Made me mad tho, how folks lie—postin’ pics from 10 years ago, lookin’ like they aged in dog years. “I’m not your puppet,” I mutter, swipin’ left so fast my thumb hurts.

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But then, outta nowhere, it starts rainin’. Like, seriously? I’m in Kastel-Stari, and it’s sunny one minute, and the next, I’m soaked. I’m runnin’ for cover, and I end up in this little shop on Ulica Šetalište. The owner’s super chill, and he’s like, “Welcome! You want a souvenir?” I’m like, “Sure, but only if it’s waterproof!”

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