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So, I tried it once – this chick, total minx, knew moves that’d make yer head spin faster than a vinyl on 45. Little known fact? Back in ancient Rome, they called it “massage with benefits” – senators got it on the down-low, sneaky buggers! Made me happy as a hippie at Woodstock – muscles loose, soul groovin’. But once, mate, this geezer botched it – rough hands, no rhythm, like a tone-deaf drummer! Pissed me off, I was ragin’ – “Oi, mate, this ain’t a wrestling hold!”

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Finally, the lights flicker back on. Thank goodness! But then, this old guy comes in. He’s got a cane and a look that says he’s seen some stuff. He’s trying to pay with coins. Like, a whole bag of coins. I’m standing there, counting them one by one, and he’s telling me about the good ol’ days on Ulica Križančevac. I’m thinking, “Dude, I wasn’t even born then!”

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