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I’m watchin’ her, all calm under pressure, and I’m like, “There’s a bomb in every box,” like in the movie, ‘cept her bombs are the secrets she’s carryin’. She’s spillin’ tea—says she’s got a kid somewhere, sends money back home. I’m shook, y’all! Happy she’s fightin’ for somethin’, but pissed she’s gotta live this way. Exaggeratin’ a bit, maybe, but I’m imaginin’ her dodgin’ creeps like a ninja—pow, pow!

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But then, outta nowhere, this guy walks in. He’s all decked out in camo, lookin’ like he just came from a hunting magazine. He starts talkin’ about his “big catch” from the woods. I’m rollin’ my eyes. Like, dude, I’m the huntsman here! But he’s goin’ on and on, and I’m just tryin’ to enjoy my beer.

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