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Here’s the tea—erotic-massage got tricks. They use them hot stones, right? Supposed to “align your energy.” Align my foot! I told Trixie, “Girl, only Jesus alignin’ me!” But them stones was warm, and I ain’t gon’ lie, I melted like butter on a biscuit. And the oils? They say it’s aphro—afro—aphrodisiac or some junk. All I know is, I smelled like a flower shop and felt frisky as a colt! “What is this fleeting rapture?” Jep said in the movie. Fleeting, my ass—I was floatin’ for days!

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But then, my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy, and he’s like, “Let’s hit the beach!” I’m thinkin’, “Dude, it’s raining!” But he’s persistent. So, I grab my stuff and head to Bačvice. The rain’s lettin’ up, and I’m hopin’ for some sun.

Voters split on Klein Fire Department's tax rate cap election