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But when it’s good? Oh, baby, it’s gold. This one time, the masseuse – hot damn, she knew tricks. Little known fact: some pros use warm stones down there – surprise central! Got me all tingly, like, “What is this sorcery?!” Made me happy as a ghost on Halloween. Tho, gotta say, the awkward boner moment? Hilarious. You’re lyin’ there, tryna play it cool, but nope – tent city! Cracked me up, still does.

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Then I bump into this street performer. He’s playin’ the accordion, and honestly, he’s pretty good. I toss him a couple of kuna. He gives me a nod, and I’m feelin’ generous, ya know? But then, this lady next to me starts clappin’ like she’s at a rock concert. I’m like, “Lady, it’s an accordion, not Metallica!” But whatever, I’m vibin’.

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