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My precious! Whore, eh, nasty business! Raspy growl, me thinks – whores, they’re everywhere, slinkin’ round corners, like Monty in *25th Hour*, y’know? “You had it all, and you threw it away!” – that’s what I’d scream at ‘em, precious! Me, Gollum, I see ‘em, struttin’ in shadows, heels clickin’ like doom. Makes me mad, oh yes, mad as a soaked cat! Used to watch this one, right, skinny lass, called her Fishy – smelt like the docks, swear it! Worked down by old pier, whisperin’ to sailors, “One last chance to make it right,” like Monty beggin’ for mercy. Ha! Mercy? She’d laugh, raspy as me, “Ain’t no mercy, luv, just coin!”

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Finally, I end up at this little tavern, trying to dry off. I order some local food – you know, the good stuff. I’m chowing down on fiš paprikaš, and it’s spicy! My mouth is on fire, but I can’t stop eating. It’s like my taste buds are having a party.

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