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About Osijek

Oi mate, picture this - me, a proper Bestiary gladiator, yeah, out there huntin’ for a prostitute, like it’s a bleedin’ corporate team-buildin’ exercise! Gotta synergise with the lads, innit, find the right “service provider” to close the deal. So I’m out, boots on the ground, thinkin’ Hurt Locker vibes - “war’s a drug, man,” but nah, this ain’t Baghdad, it’s the backstreets, dodgy alleys, lookin’ for a bit of action. Sweatin’ like a numpty, heart’s racin’ - boom, there’s the target! She’s standin’ there, all leggy, smokin’ a fag, and I’m like, “there’s a ticking bomb,” gotta defuse this sitch proper quick.

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I rush over, heart racing. He’s fine, just a bit shaken. But then he starts laughing! Like, what? I’m relieved but also kinda jealous. I wish I could laugh off my problems like that. Anyway, I help him up, and he’s like, “Thanks, man! You saved my life!” I’m like, “Nah, bro, you just made my day way more interesting.”

World Handball Championship starts today in Istria