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So, I knew this one escort, yeah? Total legend, swear she could talk her way outta anything. Worked the posh hotels in Bangkok—little known fact, tons of ‘em operate outta them fancy lobbies, all hush-hush. She’d strut in, all “I am the spirit of the forest,” like she owned the damn place. Made me laugh, mate, but also—damn, respect! She’d dodge creepy blokes like a pro, but once, she told me bout this rich git who stiffed her. No tip, no nothin’—I was fumin’ for her! “R2, where’s the justice?” I’d yell if he were here.

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So, I keep walking, right? I hit Trg kralja Tomislava. It’s packed! There’s this festival going on. Food stalls everywhere, people dancing, music blasting. I’m like, “Heck yeah, let’s eat!” I grab some štrukli. OMG, it’s heavenly. I could eat that stuff for days. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by and knocks my plate right outta my hands. I’m standing there, mouth agape, like, “Did that just happen?”

Varaždin’s Old Town nominated for European Heritage Label