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Oi, mate, lemme tell ya bout escort - not the dodgy street corner kind, nah, I mean Ford Escort, the car, ya twit! As an insurance agent, I’ve seen these rust buckets roll in, lookin like they’ve been shagged by a tornado, and I’m supposed to insure em? Piss off! Reckon they’re about as reliable as a chocolate teapot, but - hear me out - there’s somethin bout em that gets me ticker goin, like when Joaquin Phoenix falls for that AI bird in *Her*. “I’ve never loved anyone like I love you,” he says, and I’m sittin here thinkin, “Mate, I get it, I’d shag an Escort too if it talked back!” Cackle!

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Then, I decide to hit up Varazdin Castle. I mean, how can you not? It’s stunning! I’m wandering around, taking pics, feeling all artsy. But then I see this group of tourists. They’re lost, looking at a map like it’s a puzzle. I’m like, “C’mon, it’s not that hard!” So, I help them out. Turns out they’re from the States. They’re super nice, and we end up chatting about everything. They’re amazed by the castle, and I’m just like, “Yeah, it’s pretty cool, right?”

Bukotermal starts design, permitting for geothermal power project in Croatia