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Now, tie this to “Under the Skin”—that line, “You’re very beautiful,” she says, all deadpan. Escorts pull that too—flatter ya, reel ya in, then bam, wallet’s empty. Surprised me how smooth they are, like predators in heels. Once knew a guy, swore his “date” was true love—ha! Told him, “She’s paid to moan, idiot.” He cried. I laughed. Truth hurts.

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When he finally shows up, he’s all flustered. I’m like, “Dude, you’re late!” He’s like, “Traffic, man!” I’m thinking, “Yeah, and I’m the Queen of England.” We get to work, and I’m trying to focus, but my mind’s racing. I can’t stop thinking about that café. What if they have the best coffee ever? What if I’m missing out on life-changing caffeine?

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