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Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here talkin’ ‘bout sexual-massage, somethin’ the 1% probly hog for themselves! Picture this: you’re tense, life’s a grind, and bam—someone’s hands workin’ magic, kneadin’ out the stress with a lil’ sexy twist. I mean, who don’t want that? It’s like in “Caché”—you know, my fave flick—“Who’s watchin’ me?”—that creepy vibe, but flip it! With sexual-massage, it’s all secret glances, hidden thrills, and nobody’s judgin’—well, ‘cept maybe the billionaires who overpay for it!

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Drawing from the techniques of Tantra, orgasmic meditation, fascia release, acupressure and Taoist energy cultivation & healing, this one way touch experience is intended to bring you into .

First off, I’m a Banderillero, which means I’m all about that bullfighting life. But today? Today was a whole different rodeo. I hit the streets, and let me tell ya, walking down Trg Dr. Franje Tuđmana, I felt like a celebrity. People were staring, probably thinking, “Who’s this dude with the fancy outfit?” I mean, I looked good, but c’mon, I’m just trying to get to the arena!

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