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About Varazdin

So, brothels—kinda sketchy, kinda dope. Been around forever, right? Like, ancient Rome had ‘em—called lupanars, fancy shit! Little known fact: wolves howled outside, that’s the name origin—wild, huh? Makes me happy thinkin’ bout history, horny Romans runnin’ around! I’d be there, wirin’ up their togas with Bluetooth, “That’s what she said!”—cracks me up every time!

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So, I’m strolling, minding my own biz, when I see this cute café on the corner of Ulica bana Josipa Jelačića. I’m like, “Yo, let’s grab a coffee.” I walk in, and the barista? Total legend. He’s got this wild hair and a smile that could light up the whole street. I order a cappuccino, and he’s like, “You want it with a sprinkle of magic?” I’m like, “Dude, if that’s a thing, gimme!”

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