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About Budapest

I was, like, so zen but also raging—happy vibes, but pissed cuz not EVERYONE gets this glow-up! Some rando once told me it’s “just a rubdown,” and I’m like, “Bish, no, it’s art!” The way they tease your muscles? It’s next-level foreplay, no cap. Surprised me how it’s, like, healing too—my back was poppin’ after hours on Twitch. Oh, and the candles? Dim, sexy, like Timbuktu’s desert nights—“The moon hides, the stars whisper.” I’m screaming internally, “Yaaas, whisper to ME!”

Finally, I duck into a café on Paulay Ede utca. I’m dripping wet, looking like a drowned rat. But the barista? She’s super chill. She hands me a towel and a hot chocolate. I’m like, “You’re a lifesaver!” We chat for a bit, and she tells me about her favorite spots in the city. I’m taking notes like I’m on a mission.