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Drivin’ it? Smooth as a velvet suit. Four gears, nippy engine – 1.3 litre, nothin’ fancy, but it’d scoot ya round the bends like a randy rabbit. Loved takin’ it down Carnaby Street, birds givin’ me the eye, blokes jealous as hell. Made me feel like, “I’m not going to waste time,” straight outta the movie – all moody and intense, ya know? But bloody hell, the rust! Ate those Escorts alive – proper pisses me off. Mate o’ mine had one, chassis looked like Swiss cheese in a year. Gutted, I was!

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First thing, I head to the market. The smell of fresh bread from the bakery on Fő utca hits me. I swear, it’s like heaven. I grab a loaf, and boom! I’m feelin’ good. But then, I see this dude, right? He’s tryin’ to sell me some fancy pig feed. Like, c’mon man, I know my pigs! They don’t need your overpriced stuff. I’m like, “Nah, bro, my pigs eat better than I do!” He just stares at me, confused.

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