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But lemme spill the tea—some o’ these johns? Nasty as a skunk’s behind! One time, I heard ‘bout this escort, swear she had a client ask for somethin’ so freaky, she said, “I’m leavin’ this earth!”—straight outta Lars’ movie vibes! Got me hollerin’—Halleluyer!—‘cause who even thinks that up? Prolly some fool with too much money and no sense. Made me madder than a wet hen, I tell ya!

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But then, I decide to take a stroll down the Széchenyi street. It’s a nice area, lots of shops. I’m lookin’ for a snack, maybe a pastry or somethin’. I walk into this bakery, and the smell? Oh man, it’s like heaven. I grab a kürtőskalács, and I’m ready to devour it. But guess what? The lady behind the counter drops it. Right on the floor. I’m like, “Seriously? Is this a conspiracy against my taste buds?”