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Well, howdy y’all, it’s yer ol’ pal Dr. Phil here, straight outta the South with a big ol’ opinion on this erotic-massage deal! Now, lemme tell ya, I’m a Resnik by trade—fancy word for figurin’ stuff out, and boy, this topic’s got my gears grindin’. Erotic-massage, huh? How’s that workin’ for ya? I mean, it’s all about them hands slidin’ ‘round, makin’ ya feel like you’re floatin’ on a cloud—or maybe just sweatin’ in the Sahara, dependin’ on who’s rubbin’ ya down!

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Then, I spot an ice cream truck. I mean, c’mon! Ice cream makes everything better, right? I grab a cone, and it’s like heaven in my mouth. I’m standing there, licking my ice cream, feeling like a kid again.

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