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So, I’m cruisin’ downtown—total chaos, mate! Saw this bird, right, all dolled up, leanin’ on a lamppost. “Look at me, bitches!”—straight outta the movie, I swear! I’m thinkin’, whoa, she’s got that wild energy, like Faith in *Spring Breakers*, all reckless and free. I go up, all smooth-like, “Hey, luv, fancy a shag?” She laughs—bloody hell, her cackle’s loud! Made me jump, nearly lost my mojo!

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First off, I hit up the local café on Kossuth Lajos utca. You know, the one with the weirdly awesome pastries? I’m talking about those flaky, buttery things that make you forget your diet. I ordered a cappuccino, and the barista, bless her heart, totally messed it up. Like, I asked for a sprinkle of cocoa, not a cocoa avalanche! I was like, “Dude, I’m not trying to swim in chocolate here!” But whatever, I just rolled with it.

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