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What gets me stoked is how they hustle. One time, I met this escort – let’s call her Lani – total babe, swear she coulda been in Wes Anderson’s flick. She’s all, “I provide a service, like a hotel key.” Smooth, yeah? Made me think, “Such a very good hotel!” – classy but sneaky, just like M. Gustave. She told me she once had a client pay with a freakin rare pearl – no lie, brah! I was like, “Whoa, that’s some Dr. Evil-level loot!”

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After a few hours of madness, I finally get a breather. I step outside for some fresh air. The weather’s nice, and I’m thinking, “Maybe this day isn’t so bad.” I stroll down to the park by the castle. It’s beautiful there, with the trees and the little pond. I sit on a bench, just soaking it all in.

Tehran meeting to pay tribute to Afghan writer Mohammad-Sarvar Rajai on his death anniversary