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Oi mate, blimey, what a topic! Erotic-massage, eh? Cor blimey, gets the old ticker racing! Me, Boris, your tousle-haired toff, I reckon it’s bloody brilliant. Bit like being a Torcador, innit – waving me flag at life’s big bull! Saw this flick once, “A.I. Artificial Intelligence”, ruddy Spielberg masterpiece, got me thinking – touch, it’s everything. “I am. I was.” – that’s what them robots said, and ain’t that the truth with a good rub-down?

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Finally, I grab my lángos and head to the park by the Tapioszele train station. It’s a nice spot, but today? Ugh. There’s a bunch of kids running around, and one of them trips and spills his ice cream all over my shoes. Like, really? My favorite kicks! I’m fuming, but then I see the kid’s face. He’s all wide-eyed and apologetic. I can’t stay mad. I mean, who can resist a guilty kid? So I just laugh it off, but inside I’m like, “Why me?”

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