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I’m picturin’ it now—dim lights, some jazzy tune. Hands movin’ slow, like—too slow! “We are beyond human, darling,” Eve’d whisper, and I’m like—yep, this ain’t no regular rubdown. Makes me happy, tho—why not? Feels good, right? But here’s the kicker—some folks pay big bucks, hundreds! For what? A tease? A thrill? I’d be laughin’—or cryin’—if it’s all hype. Once heard a guy say it “healed his soul”—c’mon, buddy, it’s a massage, not Jesus!

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Finally, the rain stops, and we head out. The streets are glistening, and I’m feeling all poetic. We wander down to the Tisza River, and it’s beautiful. The sunset is painting the sky, and I’m just standing there, soaking it all in.

Hungary’s first railway tram will start rolling between Szeged and Hódmezővásárhely on 22 February