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Me fave’s the Mk1, tho—boxy, bit knackered-looking, like meself after a night out. Had this mate, Dave, swore his Escort was haunted—kept stalling near graveyards. Reckon it was just knackered carburetor, but he’d go, “Boris, it’s got a soul!” Laughed me head off—soul in a Ford? Pull the other one! Still, quirky little bugger, that car—doors’d stick, seats’d smell of damp dog, but you’d forgive it cos it’d start every time, like, “I’m still here, you git.”

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I get to the market, and it’s packed. People everywhere, haggling over fish and veggies. And there I am, the rat guy, lookin’ for trouble. I spot a rat the size of a cat. No joke! This thing’s strutting around like it owns the place. I’m thinkin’, “Dude, you’re not the king of this jungle!”

Patrol Vessels from Japan to Strengthen Balikpapan Naval Base