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Now, *Brokeback* – “there’s no reins on this one” – that’s erotic-massage for ya! No rules, just slidin’ about, oil slick as a politician’s promise. I reckon Ennis and Jack could’ve used a good knead, loosen up that angst. Me, I’d be rubbish at givin’ it – sausage fingers, all thumbs, I’d probs elbow someone’s spine out! Got me thinkin’, though – what if I’d tried it on me ol’ mate Dave Cameron? “Oi, Dave, fancy a rubdown?” He’d have legged it faster than you can say *Eton mess*! Made me chuckle, that.

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Here is the finest spa in town! Located in the heart of Kuta, Puri Handayani Spa by The Banjar Bali invites you to feel authentic Balinese treatments.

So, we finish up, and I’m still coughing up sand. We head over to Pasar Banjar. Man, that place is a trip! The smells hit ya first—spices, fried snacks, and something that smells like… well, I don’t wanna know. We’re dodging people left and right on Jl. S. Parman. It’s packed!

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