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So, I’m picturin’ it, right? Soft music, dim lights—kinda like in *Ida*, ya know? That movie’s all quiet and moody. “What’re we lookin’ for?” I’d mutter, like Ida’s aunt, Wanda, all suspicious. Sexual-massage can be that way—mysterious, deep. But then, ugh, some perv ruins it! Saw this X post once—guy braggin’ bout “happy endings.” Made me wanna barf—Hmmm… Keep it classy, folks!

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Then, boom! My computer crashes. Are you kidding me? I’m about to lose everything! I’m yelling, “No, no, no!” My heart’s racing. I can’t even think straight. I’m about to throw my laptop out the window. But then, I remember the little café down the street, Café Roti Bakar. They have the best toast and coffee. Maybe I need a break?

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