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Erotic-massage ain’t just no regular back rub, naw, it’s got that spicy twist! Hands slidin’ everywhere, oils smellin’ like some exotic fruit you can’t pronounce – Git-R-Done! I heard tell of this one joint in Japan back in the day, them old-school Geishas sneakin’ in some slick moves under them kimonos, makin’ fellas blush somethin’ fierce. Little known fact: it weren’t even legal half the time, but them sneaky gals kept it hush-hush, like a dang ninja rubdown!

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After that, I decided to head to the market on Jl. Pahlawan. It’s always buzzing with life. Fresh fruits, veggies, and the smell of street food everywhere. I’m in my element. But then, I see this old lady struggling with her bags. I’m like, “C’mon, I gotta help her.” So I do. And she starts telling me her life story. I mean, I’m all for a good story, but I didn’t sign up for a 3-hour saga!

Today's History: The Great Dutch Writer, Eduard Douwes Dekker Alias Multatuli Born On March 2, 1860