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It’s all ‘bout da touch, ya? Slow, teasin’, like when Sam says, “I love you, but you don’t know what you’re talkin’ bout.” Dat’s me wit erotic-massage – love it, don’t get it fully. Lightbulb! It’s not just sexy-time trick, it’s science too! Relaxes muscles, pumps blood, makes ya brain go zzzz. I tried once, ya, in shady parlor – lady was like ninja, hands everywhere! Surprised me, I yell, “What is dis sorcery?!” She laugh, I laugh, den I’m floatin’ like on cloud.

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Finally, I get to the café, and guess what? My boss is already there, looking all serious. Ugh, the pressure! I order my coffee, and it’s like the barista can read my mind. “You look like you need a double shot.” Right? I’m like, “You have no idea!”