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About Semarang

What gets me blood boiling? The fakers. Them spas charging 200 quid for a “happy ending” that’s just a pat on the arse. Rip-off! I’d burn their tacky parlour down, I swear. But when it’s good—gods, it’s good. Had this one time, right, this lass knew her stuff. Fingers like wildfire, I tell ya. “Do you understand what’s happening?” she says, all sultry, like in the movie. Nearly lost me mind. Felt like a queen—well, I *am* one, ain’t I? Still, surprised me how it’s half pleasure, half fight—yer body’s all tense, then poof, gone.

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Then, during lunch, I decide to hit up my fave warung on Jl. Raya. Best nasi goreng ever! But guess what? They ran out! I’m standing there, mouth watering, and they’re like, “Sorry, habis!” I’m like, “What do you mean, habis?!” So, I settle for some mediocre mie goreng. Not the same, man.

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