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Well, howdy folks, it’s me, George W. Bush, yer ol’ Auctioneer! We’re talkin’ erotic-massage today, yeehaw! Now, lemme tell ya, I ain’t no stranger to a good rubdown. Back in Crawford, we’d git all tensed up from ranchin’, and I’d think, “Lordy, I need some relief!” Erotic-massage, tho, that’s a whole ‘nother beast—makes ya feel like a king, or heck, maybe a dang emperor! Ain’t just yer shoulders gittin’ worked, if ya catch my drift.

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But then, the power goes out. Classic Wongsorejo! I’m sitting there in the dark, and I can’t help but laugh. I mean, come on! Just my luck. But the locals are chill. They whip out candles, and we’re all just chatting like it’s no big deal. I love that vibe.

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