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About Jakarta

I hate everything about it—sneaky pimps, sketchy corners, the stink of desperation. Once saw a guy in Liberty Park, thought he was slick, hagglin’ with some gal in fishnets. Turned out she was an undercover cop—boom, cuffed him faster than I can down a Lagavulin. Laughed my ass off, stupid bastard deserved it. Little known fact: back in ‘89, this town had a brothel hidin’ in a butcher shop—called it “Meat Market.” Cops raided it, found a ledger with half the council’s names. Surprised? Nah, pissed me off—hypocrites everywhere.

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So, I hit up this little warung on the corner. You know, the one with the blue awning? Yeah, that one. I ordered nasi goreng, and while I was waiting, I saw this dude trying to sell coconuts. He was like, “Coconuts! Fresh coconuts!” But he was so dramatic about it, waving his arms like he was conducting an orchestra. I couldn’t help but laugh.

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