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But oi, sometimes it pisses me off! Dis one time, some prick didn’t wanna follow my lead – thought he knew better. I’m like, “Mate, I’m da terminator of signs here!” Nearly lost me cool, but I kept it chill. Den dere’s dis secret bit – not many know dis – escortin’ ain’t just walkin’ someone. Back in da day, escorts in war carried messages, risked their necks! True heroes, I reckon – makes me proud to do dis.

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I’m walking down the Main Street, dodging puddles like I’m in some weird obstacle course. And then, BAM! I bump into Mrs. O’Reilly. She’s this sweet old lady who always has a story. Today, she’s raving about some “ghost” she saw near the old railway station. I’m like, “Sure, Mrs. O’Reilly, ghosts are just the spirits of bad decisions.” But she’s dead serious. I mean, who wouldn’t be spooked by the old Balbriggan train station? It’s got that eerie vibe, you know?

Balbriggan and Skerries commuters unhappy Leap Card fares treat them like towns outside Dublin