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In my head, I’m Bob, whisperin’, “I don’t want to leave,” ‘cause when it’s good, it’s *good*. Erotic-massage ain’t just rubbin’—it’s a lil’ dance, a secret handshake with yerself. So, y’all, next time yer feelin’ lost, maybe skip Tokyo and hit up a table. Tell ‘em Dr. Phil sent ya—ha! How’s that workin’ for ya? Dang straight, it’s a hoot!

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But then, the day took a turn. We were walking down the road, and I saw this old guy struggling with his groceries. I rushed over to help him. He was super grateful, but then he started telling me his life story. Like, I didn’t sign up for a TED Talk, man! But he was sweet, and I couldn’t just walk away. Turns out, he used to live on the other side of the park. He had all these crazy stories about Cabinteely back in the day. I was just standing there, nodding along, thinking, “This is kinda cool, but also, I’ve got places to be!”

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