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But—ugh—some parlors? Sketchy AF. One time, went to this joint, sticky floors, shady vibes—pissed me off! I’m thinkin, “A true warrior shows his strength in action,” not in some grimy backroom! Shoulda walked out, but nah, curiosity’s my damn kryptonite. Masseuse was pro tho—knew pressure points I didn’t even know I had. Surprised me, like—whoa, my spine’s singin! Felt like Chow Yun-Fat floatin midair, all poetic n shit.

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Then, I decide to take a walk by the river. The Carrickmacross River is so pretty, man. I’m just vibing, listening to music, and then I see this group of kids playing football. They’re all shouting and laughing, and I’m like, “Damn, I miss being a kid.” So, I join in. Yeah, I know, I’m a grown-up, but who cares? We’re kicking the ball around, and I’m feeling like a superstar.

Monaghan firm lodges plans for multi-million euro housing development in Carrickmacross