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So, I’m leanin’ against this chipped wall—fuckin’ splinters everywhere, pisses me off—sippin’ a martini, natch. “Shaken, not stirred,” I mutter, sizin’ her up. Did ya know, back in the day, Rome’s hookers had their own guild? True story—called themselves “meretrices,” fancy as fuck. Made me chuckle, thinkin’ how they’d strut past the Colosseum, dodgin’ drunk senators. History’s wild, innit?

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Finally, I get to the front, and the cashier? She’s chatting with her mate about last night’s episode of some reality show. I’m standing there like, “Hello? I’ve got a game to design here!” But whatever, I grab my stuff and bolt outta there.

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